Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Randomize
