Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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