Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I met the friendliest cop last night
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
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