I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
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