Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(417): View more from Missouri

Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.

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(818): View more from California

I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.

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(908): View more from New Jersey

So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.

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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.

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(443): View more from Maryland

He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.

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(631): View more from New York

If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person

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(410): View more from Maryland

On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks

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(408): View more from California

I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina

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