I wannas sexs uuuuu
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Holy shit dude........stairs
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize
