I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
And then my night got REAL pukey
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Randomize
