remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Randomize
