Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
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