tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
