Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
Randomize
