You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Randomize