im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize