I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Randomize