Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
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