so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
