oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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