i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
