that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Randomize
