i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize
