This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize