and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
