He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
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