I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
i believe in u and ur pee
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
