Jerry, you need to find god
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
