i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
