I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
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