Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Randomize