I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
