Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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