his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
