So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Randomize
