She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
You need a sexual gate keeper
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Randomize
