We're facebook friends in real life
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize
