pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
