Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
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