kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
