I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize
