dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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