i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Randomize
