I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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