Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
