Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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