It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
i believe in u and ur pee
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