What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize
