I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Randomize