You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
Randomize
