just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Randomize
