you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
