Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
