You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize