I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
Its about making memories worth repressing
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
