Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
